WHAM! RAP by Wham! (1982)

You got soul on the dole
You’re gonna have a good time down on the line
You got soul on the dole
You’re gonna have a good time down on the line

I used to sing along with these lyrics as a kid, their meaning completely escaping me. The dole? Was George rapping about a brand of banana? I had no idea this was a colloquialism for the UK’s unemployment benefits, and that “Wham! Rap” was a rallying cry against work… or at least against young people wasting away in dead-end jobs.


Written by George Michael and Andrew Ridgeley, both only 19 at the time, the song has a ballsy, in-your-face message: We’re not only refusing work and dedicating our lives to having fun, but we’re going to make sure the government funds it. And we’re encouraging others to do the same.

Later, in a 1987 Spin interview, George attempted to explain away some of the song’s sheer audacity by claiming it was intended to be a something of a joke.

When we did ‘Wham! Rap’, we were trying to do a parody. We were trying to say dough is shit by saying dough is great. I was trying to say that just because you don’t have a job doesn’t mean you’re shit. There were a lot of elements that people took serious [sic] about Wham! When we were being totally tongue-in-cheek.

Tongue-in-cheek, sure, but a parody? I hope not. What makes the song – and, consequently, the video – so enjoyable is its utterly earnest devotion to the pursuit of sheer play; the cause of young people living for a good time. Obviously, George, Andrew and director Chris Gabrin injected it with a healthy amount of humor. But I can’t imagine it being a cunningly-contrived parody of itself – the boys are having too much fun, and performing with too much soul.


The first few scenes in the video consist of your basic, low-budget set-up. Andrew, flipping though a magazine and being told off by his parents for lazing about the house jobless, is rescued from this suburban malaise by a leather jacket-clad George, who whisks his mate away to a parent-free fantasy land that closely resembles a bright white soundstage with red vinyl letters spelling out WHAM! on the back wall.


This is where the video really takes off. Suddenly, it’s a community theatre production of Grease, with George and Andy – flanked by backup ladies Pepsi and Shirlie – performing simple, ABBA-esque choreography in capri-length jeans and ballet flats. (Yes, you read that right. The men are wearing capri-length jeans and ballet flats. The ladies are in black pantsuits.)


There is something so irresistibly cheesy about this dance, combined with the song’s uber-catchy chorus (“Wham! Bam! I am a man!”) and the bravado of its message, that it transcends the boundaries of cheese just a little bit. When watching the clip, it’s easy to find yourself wondering if pop music was ever this much fun, just as you might find yourself wondering, while watching The Wizard of Oz, if any place on earth ever resembled the Emerald City.


Intercut with the dance scenes are shots of Andrew and George in the London streets, observing the 9 to 5 jerks as they scurry to and fro clutching briefcases, one man who symbolizes “Mr. Average” making a particularly goofy face into the camera.


As the clip progresses, the mood grows steadily crazier, until the end where all the stops are pulled out. The stage flashes bright colors, a crowd of partiers has swarmed the dance floor, and even Andrew’s stuffy mum and dad begin to sing along, right into the camera, presumably pulled into the fracas against their better judgment by the buoyancy of the song’s hook.


In an old standby ending later used in Cyndi Lauper’s GIRLS JUST WANT TO HAVE FUN video, the parents finally succumb to the beat as the pop music party takes over completely and life becomes one big episode of Top of the Pops.


It’s a glorious moment in Britpop history, with a hint of foreshadowing at George’s solo-career-to-come. During the song’s break, when he raps “Maybe leather and studs is where you’re at,” watch closely for a glimpse of the first George Michael butt-shot!


Even at the tender age of 19, five years before his arse got more screen time than his face in the video for FAITH, George’s bum was already hogging the show.